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The flying Oryx
At a business quiz in Hyderabad a few years ago, the question for us was to name the airline that had an Oryx for its logo. We pleaded ignorance and had to pass the question, and I thought that was the end of that…but I realized last week traveling on Qatar Airways that the airline had never really forgiven me for that miss, it was payback time!
You know when you are planning your trip and you just get this sense that it is going to be a horrible experience? That’s the feeling I had, and sadly, my worst fears came true. It all started right from the get go. I wanted to change my dates a few hours before I had to fly and called Customer Service. Apparently, they can only look up booking details and answer questions about my reservation – they are not authorized to make itinerary changes, only Reservations does that. Why someone would bother staffing a Customer Service department that isn’t empowered to Serve the Customer, I will never understand. And Reservations is only open from 9-5 Mon-Fri, so they had already left for the day when I called. A little antiquated, no? I think I’d get better response from an Indian Government agency than I did with this airline, and that’s saying a lot.
So anyways, the Customer Service rep directs me to head to the airport to make the change there for if I don’t show up at the check in counter, they’d consider me a No Show and simply cancel my ticket, without any refund of course. So I religiously head to the airport and request a reschedule – of course, same answer. The check-in clerk is only authorized to check passengers in, not make changes to your ticket. The ground operations for Qatar Airways in Bangalore are managed by an external agency, which in itself is a bad sign. And to make matters worse, this agency’s staff is indifferent, incompetent, and so focused on getting you to do what they want, not the other way around. Its worth pointing out that the single beacon of hope was the lone Qatar Airways employee at the airport, who put in a sincere effort to reschedule my ticket but wasn’t successful because the flights were so full. So I had little choice but to get on that plane.
If the experience leading to the journey was bad, the travel itself was just horrid. Miserable seats that resembled park benches with a sorry excuse for a cushion set the tone. Personal TV screens on every seat – awesome…now if only they can figure out how to put them to good use by having movies that you’d actually want to watch, they’d be put to some use! The sweet-looking stewardess had seemingly signed a pact that barred her from smiling – I don’t blame her though. If I had her job, I probably wouldn’t want to smile either. The food, you ask? Barely edible! I seriously considered eating plastic instead – and if you requested a special meal like I did, you are guaranteed to be missing something or the other in your meal – happened to me every single time. And oh btw, Asian Vegetarians apparently don’t eat dessert? When I asked, they gave me fruit instead – Nice! Thank you for watching my diet, Oryx, but can I decide what I want for dessert please?
And the airport at Doha – what is with that place? Color schemes ignored for a second, it felt like an IKEA store, only smaller. More a shopping mall than airport, the place has all these weird walkways weaving around one another, and no matter which one you take, you always seem to end up in one of the duty-free shopping aisles. If you have struggled to get out of an IKEA store like I have, you know exactly what I’m talking about. Anyways, I walk down to the coffee shop in the food court (again, more IKEA inspiration – the Swedish chain should be proud) and order a tall Americano, and the damn cup of coffee costs me $7! Of course, they served it in a container the size of a drum, but who cares? Seven dollars for a cup of coffee? I am sure it would have been cheaper to buy a barrel of oil. And it would probably have tasted better too. And oh, don’t even get me started on the restrooms. They had 4 for the entire terminal, which only housed about a couple of thousand people during that busy morning hour! And those restrooms make dirty sound like a good thing. I went to every single one of those 4, in the hope that at least one would be remotely usable, but no such luck. It was hard to even enter the place, a grim reminder of how nasty a species mankind is at times. Sad!
So, after such a delightful experience, I don’t think I ever want to fly the Oryx again – if I had to choose between flying Qatar and canceling my trip, I think I’d take the latter. I would recommend you do the same, but if you must travel, at least insist that you won’t use the airport for transit 🙂 I heard somewhere that Qatar was competing with and aspiring to be like Emirates – if my trip was anything to go by, Emirates has nothing to worry about, those aspirations will remain just that.